I love this time of year because it’s always a reminder to me that there are things I know I can work on to be my best self and be the person God created me to be. Some of those things have been a lifelong struggle for me like my acute sensitivity, my lack of self esteem and confidence, my penchant for defensiveness, and yes my overly protective, and problem-solving approach to life. But as I begin 2023 with my Tabula Rasa in my hand, I take comfort in knowing that I can write on it whatever resides deep within my heart and then it’s up to me to do everything I can to make it happen.
These past few years have been difficult for each of us and I would like to think we have learned a thing or two about ourselves, about each other, and about the world itself. As I approach my 68th year, there is no greater desire deep within me than to do everything I can for each of you, to help each of you heal, and to support the internal growth you are striving for. Earlier today at church, I was thinking that I could have the greatest house in the world with the best interior design, appliances, furniture and even the best landscaping and flowers on the outside. But none of that really matters if the house I or you come home to is an empty house because the people I love aren’t comfortable to be in this house. My empty house is not really a home and a home is really where I want to be and I think each of you wants to be as well. I want to be at home with people like each of you whom I love more than anything else in life itself. A home that each of us can come home to, whether it’s in Spring Lake, Brooklyn, Novato, or any of the other wonderful and beautiful places any one of us could choose to live.
I want to be in a home — wherever that home may be — where’s it’s always welcoming — kind of like that 1980s hit comedy Cheers and the tagline “where everyone knows my name”. A home where there’s warmth and kindness, a place where I can be nourished and I can nourish others who just might need some nourishing; a place where I learn something every day and if given permission, can share some of the things with each of you that I have learned in my life. A home where any one of us can be consoled from heartbreak, disappointment, and the setbacks that any fully-lived life will experience on the journey. Home is that place where each of us can hit the reset button but also be challenged in a loving and supportive way when one of us needs to be challenged because the Lord knows that each of us can do better and that’s what loving family members do for one another.
I will be forever sorry for any pain I have inflicted on each of you during your lifetime. It is my pain too and I will have to answer the Lord for that but in his mercy I know that he has forgiven me but I also need to ask forgiveness to each of you whom I have hurt and I hope a day will come when I can be forgiven. I believe people can change and that being honest and open with each other and honoring and embracing each other’s boundaries has endless and unimagined possibilities and all for the better. So my Tabula Rasa for 2023 is to do everything I can to help each of you heal, to be a better Dad to you, a better husband to Mom, a better grandfather to Aurora, Redding, and Irene, a better brother to my own siblings, a better friend to all of those men and women who have gifted me with some life-changing relationships, and to be a better and more engaged citizen of the world and the wonderful communities I am privileged to serve and be a part of. I want to help each of you create that real feeling of “home” no matter where I may see you or greet you. With God’s invisible hand, I pray and hope that we can spend more time together as a family in 2023 and beyond.
So I am sending my best wishes to each of you for an abundance of joy filled moments in the new year and beyond. Please know how much your Dad loves your Mom, how much he loves each of you, and how proud I am of each of you. Let’s make home the absolutely best place it could ever be. All my love, Dad/Jack
I close with a song that best captures where my heart is at this point in my life. Enjoy
